Have u ever had a moment where u're stuck in a relationship but somehow a guy managed to steal a bit of ur heart?
At the time u felt that u're ready to walk away from the relationship u've built just to be with him?
Well, i did..or at least i thought it was just a fling..
I was so ready to leave my boyfriend to be with him..
I dunno what's gotten over me but i wanted to be with him..
Only him..
But then reality hits..i'm in a relationship where i can't easily walk away from..
We've promised to build a life together..
He kept it of course..
But me?
Then we got into a huge fight..just because of this guy..
I made my boyfriend cry..
At the time, i didn't care..
All i see was him..
I almost ended it..
Even my boyfriend told my mum that i have someone new..
Thinking what my parents would think of me, i made amends with my boyfriend..
In return, i have to forget him..
I had to delete my pictures with him..
Throw away the only gift he gave me..
Block him on social media..
Without having the opportunity to explain things to him..
To at least make him understand my situation at the time..
I spend most of my nights crying because of him..
All of this just to get back my parents's trust..
Lately i suddenly thought of him..
All the memories that i blocked gushed through my mind..
I unblocked him on facebook and add him as a friend..
Hoping he'd approve..and he did..
But no message whatsoever..
So i made the 1st move..
But he pushed me away..
He was mad because i suddenly dissappeared and decided to show up now..
I tried to explain to him but he doesn't want to know..
At least i got his apology..
Now i'm spending most of my days and nights thinking about him..
His face always at the tip of my mind..
Our memories together clouded my vision..
Without realizing tears flowed down my cheeks..
God, i miss him..
I really do..
But i know he's too hurt..
So i pray to god that He will give me strength to let him go for real this time..
I pray that u'll find someone much better than me who can take good care of u..
I'm really sorry..
I wish u'll find closure and move on like what i had to..
Now all i can do is just act like everything is fine and no one will ever notice..
